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While I’ve read through the HB site for several years, this late summer and fall marks my first serious search to find a houseboy to live with me. I've had mixed results but no successful engagement of a houseboy. First off, I pass by profile with a lot of “ask me,” “maybe,” and “it depends” responses. I figure they are either window shopping, or will answer my question the way they perceive I would view favorably. Then I have a pretty good eye for fakes. The Ghana and Nigeria operators often give clues in their language usage. Nonetheless, I did lose several hundred dollars to one guy, in a gamble I knew was risky. But in dealing with young men who I perceive to be legitimate candidates I spend a lot of time going back and forth sharing information. First off, I want to be sure the understand me and my situation and needs. I want to discover what they really can an will do (sex is a very low priority in my search, housework, high.). Moreover I don’t wan to coerce a man to come here until he is certain he wants to come. I consciously avoid being pushy or rushing a commitment. I’ve corresponded with a couple of young men who dealt with me extensively but ended up choosing other employers. In both cases they sensed my slowed-down pace, non-pushy attitude as reluctance on my part. In both cases, I think they accepted placements far less desirable than what I offered (my opinion) I’d welcome feedback on the experience of others who have successfully engaged suitable houseboys, and even from those who have had little or no success.

Very well put. As I am at the beginning stage of my first search, I am very intested in the resonses you get.