(This is my first membership on a site like HB. And it certainly the first time I have participated on a forum section. Don't mean to speak out of turn).
Interesting experience and not one I would want to go through. I retired from healthcare, but during my working days, I hired many people and if they were from out of the city were my offices were located, ethics and integrity bound me to follow precisely the agreement that had been reached. Being a houseboy means doing a job. The description for what the HB does may vary from situation to situation, but it needs to be in writing. there is a position for all outside estate work, then that's the job. If there is a position involving inside the home work and the understand of physical contact is made, then that is the job. If you bring a potential HB in for an interview, it is only fair that his expenses, from the moment he leaves his home, until he returns, be the responsibility of the employer -- unless different conditions are agreed to, in writing, prior to the "interview". If you go to an interview by air, you should return the same. If prior arrangements are not made for physical contact, then a hotel room with one king bed is inappropriate.
Your comments above show that you ended up with a real jerk. I hope that, as a prospective employer, no one will ever say I did not leave up to my end of the agreement. I'm glad you are happy with your present situation and hope it goes as long as you want it to and your "employer" is fair and honest.
Gene Schneider (LegitNeed)